Now to what has intrigued me lately in obits from papers locally as well as my hometown newspaper. It is that with the passing of many folks there is no service planned. Most are cremated and they say there will be a service held at a later date. I really wonder if they ever have a service to commemorate the passing of a loved one. I also wonder if it is the economy that has caused this frequent choice of how to handle a deceased loved one? No casket, so service, no plot....just an urn placed on the fireplace or the ashes thrown to the four winds. In any case it makes one stop and think about what we should do when the death of one close to us occurs?
Many of the elderly (I don't count myself as one yet) go to extreme means to plan their funerals. They pick the hymns, what they will wear, who will preach the funeral, the pallbearers, the flowers, etc.... they call this a prudent practice, in that your bereaved loved ones will not have to make all these hard decisions. Having gone through this with my mom I can somewhat agree. I know my dad wants one song played at his funeral "It's party time" I can't quite bring myself to request this song and in fact I am not sure who sings this song.
On a more serious note, I have participated as a speaker at both of my grandmothers funerals as well as the funeral for my mom. It is interesting that I was never asked to speak at the funeral of my grandfathers? I have spoken at the funeral of a dear friend of mine. I am in the camp that feels we should hold a service for the deceased. I am not really sure about the cremation thing....I know that the spirit is not present with the body and that the body is simply an empty shell but I don't find anywhere in my reading of scripture that defines what we are to do. I do know that in the day of Christ that bodies were placed in a tomb and that they were wrapped in burial cloths and fragrances. I am not sure that there is anything at all wrong with cremation as it somewhat gives closure to the loved one we mourn. I know that when my mom died I thought many times about her in a cold grave and it truly bothered me though I know it shouldn't have as I know she was in heaven and the body was truly a shell. Still it bothers you to think about it.
I have noticed here in the south that visitations are huge and that funerals can have as many as four or five pastors to deliver one to the final resting place ( I don't really think of the grave as a resting place). I have also noted that decoration day is huge here in the south. Back home in Arkansas it is a little less elaborate but is still celebrated. There is a lot of grave visiting by my relatives in Arkansas and I too have visited my mom's grave on more than one occasion. I am not sure of the benefit other than to one's own soul.
I'll close here with my thoughts on funerals....many pastors think that this should be a time to present the gospel and scare the "hell" out of people. I believe that it should be a celebration of a life. It should be held to bring comfort to a family and help them remember the good times. It should include joyous music and even some laughter. At the same time it should recall the good things the person who has passed accomplished. It should note the Christian attributes in the persons life as well as the story of how they found God and there is nothing at all wrong with urging those in attendance to find this same peace. It is a sad occasion when the one who passed never knew God and it is difficult to celebrate at this service. It is important that all men come to know the Saviour as we all must face this day at some point. I do feel saddened when I read that no services are planned as I feel the folks involved have nothing to celebrate. I do know the maker of life, the preserver of life, the redeemer of life and while I in no way hasten my death I think I can face it realizing that it is a part of living.
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